7th
good ol’ fashioned
Well it might not be such a terrible thing that Pakistan lost—they were getting well ahead of themselves in this game. A win might have papered over some of the serious problems in the team:
1. Salman Butt is Pakistan’s best opener, and he’s god awful. On the Test opener’s checklist of must-haves—straight-bat in defense, shots around the wagon-wheel, knowing-where-your-fucking-off-stump-is, temperament, timing—Sal’s embarrassingly deficient. Beaconhouse English can only get you so far in life.
2. Don’t even get us started on Khurram Manzoor. As a sub-note: if Younis is out of form, which one can forgive the man for, you’re effectively always three men down with not much on the board. That’s err… not how to win Test matches. *cough* Afridi should play Tests *cough*— sorry just had something in our throat…
3. The whole theory that Pakistan’s middle order is difficult to get into these days is based on one man: Shoaib Malik. Don’t get us wrong, Malik actually has fantastic temperament and a keen cricketing brain, but his technique needs a lot more than fine tuning. It’s simply unfathomable that in a nation of 180 million people, Shoaib Malik is a top six batsman. Faisal Iqbal, on the other hand seems to be a decent player with terrible temperament and shit-for-brains. One hasn’t seen enough of Fawad Alam yet, but it’s worth a shot, no?
4. Ok this is a serious enough problem to warrant an extra bullet point: Misbah needs to stop getting out doing stupid shit. You would think it was just a one-off thing, or at least something that just needed some vaseline and box of kleenex to relax the man. But for fuck’s sake, what the hell was that run-out all about?
5. That Younis is responsible for five wickets in the game is great news for Younis himself, but again shows Pakistan’s lack of bowling depth. Rauf’s whole deal is he’s tall and will get bounce on a bouncy track. Fair enough—but that’s too one-dimensional for an extended run in the side. He never looked like he could swing/seam even if he tried. Also, Saeed Ajmal has limited-overs-cricket written all over him. *cough* bring Afridi out of sabbatical and fly him into Colombo now *cough*—-there it is again…strange.
6. The age old is-Umar-Gul-cut-out-for-Test-cricket-? question rears its ugly head again. We at SouLBW love the boy and wish the world for him. But we will concede that he lacks that Test match edge, that little extra mojo, which will once and for all seal his deal. He had a terrible game, but of course will do better as the series progresses, and he certainly shouldn’t be axed. C’mon Gull-ay, show me the money.
7. Aamer. We at SouLBW are reserving judgement on the boy. He did well this game, but we’re worried.
Having said all that: Pakistan collapses every once in a while—it’s our thing. The loss shouldn’t be cause for alarm bells (we did just win a World Cup), but one hopes that Younis doesn’t get too carried away with his refreshing-optimism-after-losses-spiel (the man was giggling like a school girl at the post-match interview, gotta love that shit).
